We are exposed every day to very harsh arrogant individuals, are we not? It would seem that some successful people have achieved their results by harassing others, like true bullies.
Last year I read an article on how Uber CEO Travis Kalanick berated an Uber driver. Now, we are not going to get into the particulars. But it goes on to show how a lack of humility can affect anyone in an organisation.
Become truly humble
Do you enjoy dealing with egomaniacs? I know I have found a few in recent years. It is not a pleasant experience, is it? It is quite off-putting to work with people who view thembselves as being better than others.
If I go back a few years (about twenty to be fair) I have to admit I was a bit arrogant. So full of it! Maybe you can relate to the foolishness of young age. Yep! I too was a pedantic fool. Conclusions?
Leading without humility is as smart as wet-mopping a floor starting from the door towards the inside of the room.
With time and a few painful ambushes and experiences, you kind of learn that embracing humility is the best course you can take.
But to become truly humble you have to be able to recognise the areas you need to work on. Over the years hopefuly we accept the fact we need to take steps to change our leadership style.
It is funny how this self-awareness exercise is non-existent amongst most people who are arrogant and harsh.
What motivates these aggressive behaviours?
Quite often they are motivated by subconscious drivers. In some cases the need to feel relevant, the need for significance.
One particular person I crossed paths with in recent years displayed a strong need to receive praise in regards with her intelligence. That meant she would quickly exhaust any conversation irritating others. Did she realise that was the case? Not at all. Acepting she sometimes was plain wrong would be for her a nearly impossible thing to do.
I myself have been lacking self-awarenes in many an occasion. Have I learned the lesson? I certainly would like to think so!
A lack of self-awareness can result in damage to our relationships and organisations.
On a more positive note, when you actually understand how you are behaving and recognise your own short-comings, good people will be quite forgiving and open about it. Poor leaders will not be as open to forgive.
So, are you a truly positive influential leader? Acknowledge your mistakes and move forward then.
It is fantastic if you display this kind of self-awareness and open minded attitude. But to become influential positive leaders we also have to master the art of empathy and mercy.
Remember the Golden Rule? Treating others the way you want to be treated?
You cannot fake honest empathy in your business and personal dealings. Surely you can think about a few colleagues, partners, bosses, etc., who boasted about putting you first in their business. Sad outcomes and unnecessary drama have proved them less than sincere.
My learning tip? Do not hire people who have little capacity for true humility. And humble yourself every single day. It doesn’t mean putting yourself down. Become a positive influential leader and you will have great joy out of your relationships and team members.